One thing that struck me while reading this was how it unexpectedly echoed today's Bible verse for me (1 Corinthians 10:33). Not because temptation disappeared, but because even after thirteen days there was still a way to choose truth. The quiet command to get up felt like that moment. The kind voice never stopped speaking, yet it wasn't the one that led toward freedom. That made the ending stay with me long after I finished reading.
The line, “Every day,” hit harder than anything because it finally stripped away every excuse the kind voice had been building. Even after thirteen days, the car waiting outside somehow became one of the saddest parts of the whole story.
I think addiction is one of the most important topics for our society today.
I'm surrounded by it through important people in my life, and it's dark.
I read self-help books, and my go-to person on the topic of addiction + trauma is Gabor Mate. I assume you're familiar with him.
By the way, when someone's writing makes me feel something, I want to learn more about the person behind the publication (like you said you do in our messages).
So I look for their About page and hope to see their story.
For yours, you've left the default one. I think it would be great for your readers if you give them the chance to learn more about you, what brought you here, and what you're all about (without having to go through all essays to learn).
Thank you for the first sentence. And for the second one, which was harder to write.
What you describe has almost no language of its own. The person inside it is eventually given a name for what happened to him. The people who love him are given nothing but the waiting, and the waiting is not something anyone claps for. I think it is the quietest suffering there is. I keep writing in its direction.
Maté is right where it matters most. The question was never why the addiction, but why the pain. I would only add, gently, that understanding a cause is not the same as forgiving a deed. The two have to be carried together, and that is slow work.
You asked about the person behind the publication, so let me answer simply. Substack is one of my therapies. The other one is real, and it has been walking beside this one for over a year. I needed to say aloud what was happening inside me, the sobering and the mending, so I began publishing my life in the only honest form I had, in fragments, chapter by chapter. The book is written by the same hand, at the same time.
It was never about turning more pages. It is about becoming, slowly and with some quality, a man a little better than the one who came before. The same name, the same face. Inside, nothing left where it used to stand.
And there are remarkable people here. Real work, real hands, strangers who answer. None of it is about acquiring. It is about being, and staying awake for it.
So yes, you have caught me on the About page. It is easier to write two thousand words about a life than two hundred about oneself. Readers deserve a door, not a corridor of essays.
I am still learning this place, and not everything looks the way I would like it to. Some of it is simply unfinished. I will put it right, patiently, beginning with the door.
Thank you for the questions, the observations, the suggestions. They arrived gently, and they have already turned into work.
With gratitude for reading me closely enough to tell me the truth 🙏
You express yourself in such a beautiful way, Dominic. Thank you.
Your written work is very impactful, very needed in the world. Even if one person who has been around addiction in some way reads it, it makes a real difference. And then, it touches the people in this person's life.
It feels like this kind of work is tied to your mission in this life. It will challenge you, it will open you in new ways, and it can help you be more of who you're becoming right now.
I'm excited to see where it takes you.
Thank you for acknowledging the waiting part. I actually had to learn to stop waiting when it came to my dad. Mostly in order to save myself and truly start living my life, instead of letting the darkness overpower me.
Luckily, I'm spiritual and believe that if healing doesn't happen in this life, there's always another opportunity. This has brought me a lot of peace and has allowed me to let go of control and expectations when it comes to other people's path.
You also mentioned understanding a cause is not the same as forgiving a deed. I've come to realize this too. The tricky part is to have something new to forgive for every day.
Thank you for this. None of it was owed to me, and you gave the hardest parts anyway.
Learning to stop waiting is not the same as giving up. It is the day you decide your own life will no longer be held in someone else's hands. I am glad you chose yourself. Someone had to.
Your last line will stay with me. Something new to forgive every day. That is exactly its shape, and no one warns you about it.
With gratitude for words that clearly cost something to write 🙏
That bathroom mirror scene is the best use of a doppelgänger I’ve read in a long time. Also we need some harsh words sometimes, just to get out confusion and comfort zone
You caught the whole point - the harsh voice was the only one telling the truth, and the gentle one was the trap. Comfort keeps you exactly where you are; it takes something blunt to break the spell.
One thing that struck me while reading this was how it unexpectedly echoed today's Bible verse for me (1 Corinthians 10:33). Not because temptation disappeared, but because even after thirteen days there was still a way to choose truth. The quiet command to get up felt like that moment. The kind voice never stopped speaking, yet it wasn't the one that led toward freedom. That made the ending stay with me long after I finished reading.
Hello K.,
Cruelty is easy to refuse. Kindness that keeps you where you are is not. You found that faster than I did.
Thirteen days is thirteen mornings nobody applauded.
Thank you 🙏
Dominic
The line, “Every day,” hit harder than anything because it finally stripped away every excuse the kind voice had been building. Even after thirteen days, the car waiting outside somehow became one of the saddest parts of the whole story.
Hello Jenni,
You read it exactly where it lives. "Every day" is the moment the kindness runs out of places to hide.
And you are right about the car. Objects do not grieve, so they just keep waiting, and that patience is the saddest thing they can do.
Thank you for reading this closely. It matters.
- Dominic 🌻
Hey,
You are welcome, and that moment was written so nicely. Im so impressed by your writing and the concept.
Thank you, Jenni🙏Readers like you are the reason the hard scenes are worth writing down.
Stay close - there is more coming.
- Dominic 🌻
Welcome. I guess you are an amazing personality. Take care.
That was deep and powerful!
I think addiction is one of the most important topics for our society today.
I'm surrounded by it through important people in my life, and it's dark.
I read self-help books, and my go-to person on the topic of addiction + trauma is Gabor Mate. I assume you're familiar with him.
By the way, when someone's writing makes me feel something, I want to learn more about the person behind the publication (like you said you do in our messages).
So I look for their About page and hope to see their story.
For yours, you've left the default one. I think it would be great for your readers if you give them the chance to learn more about you, what brought you here, and what you're all about (without having to go through all essays to learn).
Just thought I'd say that.
Hi Lidiya 🌻
Thank you for the first sentence. And for the second one, which was harder to write.
What you describe has almost no language of its own. The person inside it is eventually given a name for what happened to him. The people who love him are given nothing but the waiting, and the waiting is not something anyone claps for. I think it is the quietest suffering there is. I keep writing in its direction.
Maté is right where it matters most. The question was never why the addiction, but why the pain. I would only add, gently, that understanding a cause is not the same as forgiving a deed. The two have to be carried together, and that is slow work.
You asked about the person behind the publication, so let me answer simply. Substack is one of my therapies. The other one is real, and it has been walking beside this one for over a year. I needed to say aloud what was happening inside me, the sobering and the mending, so I began publishing my life in the only honest form I had, in fragments, chapter by chapter. The book is written by the same hand, at the same time.
It was never about turning more pages. It is about becoming, slowly and with some quality, a man a little better than the one who came before. The same name, the same face. Inside, nothing left where it used to stand.
And there are remarkable people here. Real work, real hands, strangers who answer. None of it is about acquiring. It is about being, and staying awake for it.
So yes, you have caught me on the About page. It is easier to write two thousand words about a life than two hundred about oneself. Readers deserve a door, not a corridor of essays.
I am still learning this place, and not everything looks the way I would like it to. Some of it is simply unfinished. I will put it right, patiently, beginning with the door.
Thank you for the questions, the observations, the suggestions. They arrived gently, and they have already turned into work.
With gratitude for reading me closely enough to tell me the truth 🙏
- Dominic🌻
You express yourself in such a beautiful way, Dominic. Thank you.
Your written work is very impactful, very needed in the world. Even if one person who has been around addiction in some way reads it, it makes a real difference. And then, it touches the people in this person's life.
It feels like this kind of work is tied to your mission in this life. It will challenge you, it will open you in new ways, and it can help you be more of who you're becoming right now.
I'm excited to see where it takes you.
Thank you for acknowledging the waiting part. I actually had to learn to stop waiting when it came to my dad. Mostly in order to save myself and truly start living my life, instead of letting the darkness overpower me.
Luckily, I'm spiritual and believe that if healing doesn't happen in this life, there's always another opportunity. This has brought me a lot of peace and has allowed me to let go of control and expectations when it comes to other people's path.
You also mentioned understanding a cause is not the same as forgiving a deed. I've come to realize this too. The tricky part is to have something new to forgive for every day.
Hi Lidiya 🌻
Thank you for this. None of it was owed to me, and you gave the hardest parts anyway.
Learning to stop waiting is not the same as giving up. It is the day you decide your own life will no longer be held in someone else's hands. I am glad you chose yourself. Someone had to.
Your last line will stay with me. Something new to forgive every day. That is exactly its shape, and no one warns you about it.
With gratitude for words that clearly cost something to write 🙏
Dominic 🌻
P.S. And congratulations on crossing that subscriber milestone 😉 Impressive, and clearly earned.
Thank you 🙏🏻☺️
Hello Lidiya, forwarded. To the woman who chose herself.
Dominic 🌻
That bathroom mirror scene is the best use of a doppelgänger I’ve read in a long time. Also we need some harsh words sometimes, just to get out confusion and comfort zone
Hello Marcello,
You caught the whole point - the harsh voice was the only one telling the truth, and the gentle one was the trap. Comfort keeps you exactly where you are; it takes something blunt to break the spell.
Grateful you read it this closely - Dominic